Dream lover yet again
I want what Zezrie wants...On Tuesday, Jan 11, 2004, Zezrie wrote in her blog:
I am yearning for a certain man. A very very specific one. A man who is full of magic and energy and innocence. One who loves with every pore and cell he has. Passion as deep and wide and fathomless as the sea. He opens his mouth and poetry and jazz pours forth. This man is in my very deepest soul. I can taste him in my mouth and smell him on my clothes. I feel his skin holding mine. I read his words and cry and rejoice. I strain to hear his voice on every memory of sound. I ache for another soul I will never have...
Her words are pulled out of my psyche, I swear. I am being haunted by the memory of a lover I have never met. It is a tease: my flesh leaping to ghost touches, an almost-heard voice thirilling my mind, and feeling that parturient flutter in my solar plexus that says "He is real, he is thinking of you, he is coming to you, this ineffable, numinous One for whom you have waited." I take a shallow breath past the sun that has filled my chest, and the taste and smell of him are there, just a hint, like last night's scents radiating from my heated skin.
In my dreams last night he visited me but we did not make love, no, we talked, we read, we cuddled. There he sat, on a loveseat in a room in my mind, in the house that has always been mine in my dreams, which is so rarely occupied by anyone other than myself. Sometimes he read to me, or sang silly songs, sometimes I rubbed his neck and shoulders and listened to him purr. And we spoke of many things, of things dark, and light, and deep, and mundane. I don't remember most of what we talked about, but I remember him saying "Don't be afraid" and "Live in the now".
When I woke up I felt a bit tired, but more peaceful. He's out there. I may never meet him, yet, I do not despair that I will never have him in my life--just knowing he is there, somewhere, somewhen, is a comfort to me. I only hope I shall one day meet him, and in meeting him, know him for the soul that is intertwined with mine, lover or not.
I am yearning for a certain man. A very very specific one. A man who is full of magic and energy and innocence. One who loves with every pore and cell he has. Passion as deep and wide and fathomless as the sea. He opens his mouth and poetry and jazz pours forth. This man is in my very deepest soul. I can taste him in my mouth and smell him on my clothes. I feel his skin holding mine. I read his words and cry and rejoice. I strain to hear his voice on every memory of sound. I ache for another soul I will never have...
Her words are pulled out of my psyche, I swear. I am being haunted by the memory of a lover I have never met. It is a tease: my flesh leaping to ghost touches, an almost-heard voice thirilling my mind, and feeling that parturient flutter in my solar plexus that says "He is real, he is thinking of you, he is coming to you, this ineffable, numinous One for whom you have waited." I take a shallow breath past the sun that has filled my chest, and the taste and smell of him are there, just a hint, like last night's scents radiating from my heated skin.
In my dreams last night he visited me but we did not make love, no, we talked, we read, we cuddled. There he sat, on a loveseat in a room in my mind, in the house that has always been mine in my dreams, which is so rarely occupied by anyone other than myself. Sometimes he read to me, or sang silly songs, sometimes I rubbed his neck and shoulders and listened to him purr. And we spoke of many things, of things dark, and light, and deep, and mundane. I don't remember most of what we talked about, but I remember him saying "Don't be afraid" and "Live in the now".
When I woke up I felt a bit tired, but more peaceful. He's out there. I may never meet him, yet, I do not despair that I will never have him in my life--just knowing he is there, somewhere, somewhen, is a comfort to me. I only hope I shall one day meet him, and in meeting him, know him for the soul that is intertwined with mine, lover or not.
posted by KR | 2/17/2005 05:36:00 PM
3 Comments:
LOL it reads so much better when you post it...You keep posting me and i will get the conceited idea Im a good writer :P
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Oh BTW..that was based on my fantasy obsession...he exists alright nut not in my world LOL
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